After the name, I think it was the scene of eating the fruit, then mollusks, that first grabbed my attention. Really, the mannerisms on display really haven't changed much since becoming a sadistic psychopath. Sorry, but that's just the emotions these characters tend to bring out in me. Anyway, despite the changes, it seems her core personality is still intact. That's actually kind of terrifying, suggesting anyone could become like her.
"through the raindrops pattering at her face were cold" though, no r
If she's wearing yellow pants, she's not "entirely" naked.
"or anything that it would be uncomfortable to step on." no it
"“Well?” he double asked, anxiously." heR
“Are we disagreeing?” Yeah. That's really weird to have differences form so soon after the split, which is a really fascinating concept, by the way.
Um... what!? What-what-what-what-what!? You sneaky sneak of a sneak. You tricked me!
...
Well played.
“It’s okay. There’s no need to be scared.” I guess my earlier comments are kinda-sorta rendered mute, but I insist on moving them down here to call Milly a sociopath for suggesting the prospect of dying slowly in a stomach is not something to fear, her own immediate intentions be damned.
"Her irritation faded, as she simply felt sorry for them." Sorry for people she'd have no qualms chewing slowly if she liked the taste of blood. Again, sociopath.
Ya know, while they wouldn't know this, explaining their situation about being duplicated might earn a predator's interest enough to not eat them.
That comment about Jora and Tanny followed by remembering her promise to people she doesn't even consider people. How many times can I say it?
Jade is taller than Milly? Really? I was kinda under the impression that nagas in general were bigger than regular giants, and that Milly was especially big among nagas. Huh. Now my proportions are all messed up. Wait... if I find out you deliberately threw me for a loop a second time, I'm going to hunt you down and give you such a pinch.
"“I see.” Jade’s tone was flat, and hard once more." You don't say it, and it might just be that I'm familiar with the characters, but this is written in such a way that her thoughts are tremendously visible, yet are conveyed without the need to so much as write something like "in deep thought." Most excellent. I can only hope to mimic that level of quality someday.
“I need to get home.” Why? What the hell does she have that's so urgent? Or is Jade just that intimidating?
"enclosed areas with animals in them" You know why I'm marking this, and thank you.
In conclusion, I look forward to seeing what becomes of these doubles.